Unless there is violates, hitting and no sex anymore. I would just do whatever in the hell you want to. Believe me he is getting sex from somewhere some men want sex with no strings attached. If you do all the cooking, cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping. Maybe you’ll out live him. Enjoy life with your friends, grandchildren and whatever your interested in. Life goes by so quickly do not waste time trying to figure your spouse out . If they want to make things better between the both of you to do it! You can get a divorce if you are so unhappy because this can effect your health stress in it self will make a sick person out of you or kill you!
How would you like it when I cant drink at all because Epeilpsy and my husband works then comes home and keeps drinking a 12 pack at night plus Whiskey on top of that too!!And all i get is getting abused buy him and so moral support at all!I cook clean and do a lot for him i am giving up because dont need to need to be yelled at all. So i am getting the hell out of this state and going to file for divorse i dont NEED his Crap anymore at all. Sure we have be married 37 years but there is no affection or anything at all . Thanks for hearing me out and i will get out this Crappy marriage too. Lisa
However, you absolutely must know your financial situation and have a plan for your financial future post divorce
katie, what you don’t mention is whether that woman actually DID learn to clean better. Bwahahahaha, just kidding! I’m sure she did.
I, myself, at 50, love living alone! I make my own rules up as I go. However, I have to be very careful financially. I lived with the negativity for 20 years before I stopped trying. The difference is that I worked full time outside the home and had my own income. I am NOT saying that you should allow finances to be the ONLY determining factor in your decision. Good Luck!
I sure was. C’mon! A bit sexist – no? It’s also absurdly naive to think that a couple that is about to LOSE it’s only source of income can easily simply absorb such an additional expense.
I wasn’t suggesting that the LW stay married for money. I was just being realistic that it’s likely she will have a tough financial future if she strikes out on her own.
This letter seems fake to me, mainly because I haven’t heard the word “housewife” used seriously in decades, but perhaps that’s a regional thing. So, imagining it as real– seriously, this husband of yours has provided 100% financial support for you for 40 years (details are missing here in the letter), and you are still complaining? If he is negative and unhappy, maybe it is because of that, and maybe he doesn’t like you too much either? Maybe he feels used and unappreciated? Since you say that you don’t want to leave, how about if you get out and do some work for pay for awhile, just part-time. Then you’ll get your time away from this monster and he can enjoy a little bit of relaxation and private time in your joint home.
“Well I liked what I was getting so I said no” – to his request of spicing up your sex life with some variance in positions? You just said “no”?! Way to compromise and empathetic to the other 50% of the marriage. I can’t imagine this is a real letter, it’s shocking.